Yoga and fighting influenze

Over the past month (4 weeks) I have had the dubious honour of being afflicted with the very debilitating sickness of influenza. I have learnt an awful lot about my self and this bug during this time.

Most people will complain during the winter months of having a cough or a cold and I thought I was one of those people. Both my kids were sick for a week each, consecutively and the following week I was not feeling well. Being a mother of two it is difficult to take time off and slow down and get more rest so I did not do that. I continued with the school runs, the shopping, clothes washing and my yoga practice.

After 2 weeks I found myself in a place of sickness I do not feel I have ever visited and quite frankly I am very keen to not visit there again. My lungs burned like I have not experienced before, breathing was difficult and the lethargy that filled my body was never ending. I was panicking a little bit to tell the truth and the thought of mortality was quite a shock. Funnily enough, the one thing that filled my mind was that I wanted to be mother of the bride to my daughter at some point. Yes, she is only 6 and I have quite a wait until that day but nevertheless that is where I would like to be. I want a fabulous frock and to see my little girl waltzing down the aisle. Funny the things that come up when you are on your death bed, or so I felt.

It was then that my yoga experiences and knowledge helped me so much. The old me would have continued to push forward, attending all and sundry there was on offer. Coughing and spluttering and feeling terrible but not letting on.

This time I stopped. Kindness to myself is the first step towards kindness to my family. I can hardly support anyone when I am feeling like half a person can I? I did not attend my beloved yoga class for 2 weeks. Once that news made its way out into the community the calls began thick and fast. “My goodness” they all cried, “2 weeks off yoga, she must be really sick”. Then the offers of help came in and this time in my life I accepted. Yes, really. What a change. It is ok to accept some help from your friends, even when you are the one who normally assists everyone else. It is ok to have a turn on the other end.

Yoga is just not all about the postures and touching your toes with straight legs. It is learning about yourself and acknowledging what is real in your life and looking at it.

After two weeks off I went back to class. I started slowly and gently and began the process of reawakening my sore lungs. Just little and slow breaths at first, feeling out where I was at. Letting my sitting bones connect with the earth and my spine lengthen. Uddiyana bandha (drawing my navel in toward my spine and breathing past this area) helped me to open through my chest and my shoulders moved back, sweetly and gently. How very delightful.

As I began my first practice after the sickness I allowed myself to go smoothly and quietly through the standing postures. Concentrating on my breath and seeing what came up. Well lots and lots of green stuff actually!! Yucky but good to get rid of it.

It is now two weeks later and I am back on the mat 5 times a week as usual. But not as hard core as normal. With grace and some integrity for where I really am. My body is still weak and that is a great surprise for me. Usually I bounce straight back but this time I was hit hard. I will take it easy for at least the next 3 weeks and only once I feel my constitution can handle it will I start to rock the mat like before.

Yoga is teaching me a much needed humility and really, humble pie is not that bad to eat. It doesn’t taste that great at the beginning but it is so good for the soul.

It doesn’t pay to always push forward, sometimes it is appropriate and the correct thing to do to cruise. Enjoy the light that yoga brings. My lungs are improving and my family have learnt that sometimes mama needs help. Maybe they knew already and it was me that did not understand that.

Yoga as a therapy is invaluable and again I am grateful and humbled at the extent it can affect my family. As I went off to class this morning my delightful 6 year old said to me “take it easy mama and let the yoga help you get better”. I could have cried, she understands what yoga brings me. Who better to help me learn the necessary and difficult lesson of kindness to myself.

Taking care of others I find easy and that is what I want to do. Taking care of myself is far more difficult for me. My daughter, son and my yoga practice are teaching me that this is where I could and can learn.

Thank you